Vitality Stories
Bonnie
7 Year-old Detective Solves Her First Case In 1942
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I’m excited to continue sharing excerpts of Bonnie’s memoirs. As is my practice, I strove to capture her memories word-for-word out of respect for her voice, recollection, and perspective. Continue reading
Vitality Stories
Leona and Bonnie, April 1935
I’m Glad Dad Wasn’t Fired For Getting Me An Egg
I’m excited to begin sharing excerpts of Bonnie’s memoirs with each of you on a regular basis. As is my practice, I strove to capture her memories word-for-word out of respect for her voice, recollection, and perspective. I hope you enjoy her reflections and memories as much as I did. Continue reading
Vitality Stories
Leona Beck
The Best Way To Meet Your Parents
Sometimes it takes two
If you really want to get to know your parents, or a loved one, write their memoirs.
My mom, Bonnie, and I wrote her memoirs and the experience changed the way I think about her as a person. Before Memoirs (BM) she was my imperfect mother. But today, I think of her as a woman who was navigating her way through life, in a different era, making choices that resulted in pride, laughter, tears, or regret. I catch myself comparing my life at forty-four years old to what she was doing when she was forty-four, and every single time I think, whew, I’m so glad I’m not in those shoes. (If I was, I would have eight kids with a ninth on the way, a troubled marriage, a pile of bills, and I’d be struggling with undiagnosed bipolar disorder.) I also learned to accept that her perception is her reality and this makes me more patient when our collective memories or experiences don’t add up.
What I’m trying to say is writing your parent’s memoirs might be one of the best gifts you’ll ever give to yourself. It will be a different gift for each person. In my case, it was forgiveness.
But where to start? How to start? There are many books available on how to write memoirs. I’m sure my process will continue to improve, but for those of you who are thinking about this worthwhile project, here are the steps I take with each of my clients. Continue reading
Vitality Stories
Lesson #6
You‘re never too old for field trips, trikes, and milkshakes
I recently visited my mother in Carson City, Nevada. I hadn’t been there in almost two years, but after moving from the east coast and living on the road for the past four months, the road, actually a plane, landed me in Northern Nevada.
Thanks to technology, I’d been in touch with my mom on a regular basis, but now that I was going to be in town for 10 days, I had a laundry list of things to help her with in an effort to give my local siblings ‘serving on the ground’ temporary respite from meeting Mom’s needs. I’d be doing her shopping, cleaning, defrosting her dormitory freezer…you get the picture.
I was also in town to see friends and take my first headshots, but my mom was anxious to see me and I have the cell phone log to prove it. My visit would be a treat because I had promised Continue reading
Vitality Stories
Interview #2
Bonnie, 2nd from left, WCCO Radio, March of Dimes Telethon
Hello, My Name Is Bonnie
Why, What, How
Most of the senior citizens I’ve met yearn to be an example of success and happiness. They don’t relish the idea of anyone making their same mistakes. Often times, they don’t always know WHY they made a certain choice, but they almost always know WHAT they would do differently given the chance, and they always know HOW they want to be remembered. Continue reading
Vitality Stories Lesson #2
Bonnie’s (bottom right) first job out of high school at a CBS radio station in Minneapolis.
Quality friendships count and the matter, rather than the method, is key.
Bonnie married three times, had nine children, owned several dogs, and often worked swing shift waitressing in casinos, and while she never had a minute to herself, she was heart-numbingly lonely. She wondered, Continue reading
Vitality Stories Lesson #1
As long as you can breathe, you can check a dream off your list.
I have acquired the hobby of ghost writing memoirs for the elderly who are afraid of being forgotten when they pass away. It’s true. You’d be shocked how many people fear they will disappear from loved ones memories despite several children, dozens of grandchildren, and a million great-grandchildren, of losing recognition for their life lessons, and credit for their successes, and finally, they want people to always remember who they loved, how they loved, what they regret, and the curve balls and lemons tossed their way. They want credit. They want validation. They want forgiveness. And I soak up their every word and never pass on an opportunity to help them share their story with their families. I do it for free because Continue reading